Dealing with shame in sobriety is a common struggle for many addicts and alcoholics once you’re off the drugs. Most times drug users do things they are not proud of in the middle of an addiction. From unspeakable acts to acquire drugs, petty crime and taking advantage of friends, family and those who get in the path of destruction, it is easy to blame these actions on the drugs and not take responsibility. These poor decisions have lasting consequences and can make a person feel overwhelming shame. However, it doesn’t have to be like that forever. Through counseling and twelve-step recovery, you can overcome the feelings of guilt and shame in sobriety.
Why Shame is Felt
The shame felt in sobriety is derived from the wreckage created by actions or by putting oneself in an environment where bad things can happen. According to an article about releasing the shame of addiction,
“when we feel shame, it is about who we are, and we tell ourselves that we are a bad person because of what we’ve done.”
Once sober, dealing with a full range of feelings can be confusing and frustrating because these emotions may not have been experienced in a long time. For some, feelings of shame may be attached to each waking moment, leading to worry, anxiety, and depression. Before a person starts to spiral out of control it is wise to deal with the emotions and seek help if need be. Once you’ve identified the reason for feeling guilt and shame, you can work to overcome these feelings and become stronger in your personal recovery journey.
Alleviating Shame
The fourth step of Narcotics Anonymous (NA) is about taking an inventory and sharing it with someone trustworthy such as a sponsor or therapist. According to an online published pamphlet of NA, “we will begin to see ourselves as we really are, rather than as we imagined or fantasized. The more accurate and complete this picture is, the more freedom we will gain.”
In time, many past actions can be put into perspective by learning to identify and examine how shame is connected to various consequences. These “new” emotions can become overwhelming. Journaling is a positive way to allow for reflection and in the future, a look back on old journals can be an indicator of growth.
Part of identifying the effect shame has on a person’s life is learning to recognize mistaken beliefs. Sometimes it is best to remember there is not anything one can do to change the past and instead gradually change the things that can be worked on. If a person is mindful to counter negative thoughts with positive ones, healing and growth take place and it is easier to work through blame associated with past actions.
Throughout the addiction treatment process at Restore Health and Wellness Center, clients learn to deal with shame in sobriety with the help and assistance of addiction therapists. Our comprehensive approach to treating addiction focuses on cognitive behavioral therapy as a way to reframe negative thinking patterns into positive thoughts. Contact us for an assessment today if you know anyone that is struggling with addiction or are dependent on drugs/alcohol yourself. Visit our addiction treatment center in Calabasas, CA at 6918 Owensmouth Ave Canoga Park, CA 91303. 24/7 Admissions (818) 722-9019. On-Site Contact (818) 806-3914.
